The (not so) Secret Life of a Cat Lady

   I suppose it's a mixture of busy-ness and laziness that has kept me from posting more than I should have.  Busy working towards the finalé of the semester, busy preparing the holiday goodies and entertaining family at holiday parties.  Busy with doctor appointments and medical tests in preparation for the bariatric surgery.  Busy making decisions about my educational goals.  All of these can make a girl feel lazy in her down time and when I did have those moments I spent them with family...or reading...or watching Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.  Just the same, I have had many changes come about and should have been taking the time to document them here since I have never been good at keeping a personal journal.  That being said, here are some of those changes...in no particular order:

   After nearly 5 years of living in various other places, I have made a prayerful decision to return to Utah.  I desire to further enhance my education by attending Brigham Young University.  As of today I have submitted most of my application, minus the fee and ecclesiatical endorsement. If all goes well and if I am admitted, I will begin attendance as early as August of this year. My family is very supportive and my parents are willing to do whatever they can to help me to achieve my goals.  As for my reasons for wanting to attend BYU, 1- it's a good school, both academically and morally. 2- it's closer to my brother and sister and I am tired of missing them because I cannot take vacation time but during the summer months. 3- it's time, time for me to let go of memories that could forever limit me from my eternal glories and blessings and time for me to achieve all that I have the potential to achieve.  And finally, I am missing the moments in my nephews and nieces lives that are forever going to remind of the miracle of God's children and I am tired of it!  My aunts have been there all my life and have offered a point of view seperate from my parents and I hope to be able to be that kind of friend to my nieces and nephews.

   As a back-up plan I have no problem attending Utah Valley University until BYU is willing to accept my application, should they deny me for the next semester...but I am aiming high and remaining confident that BYU is where the Lord wants me to be.

   I am still working as I can to have bariatric surgery before the year is through.  Where I initially wanted to have it here in Colorado at Fort Collins, I have decided to go to my mother's surgeon in Utah instead and will begin making those arrangements as soon as I hear from BYU.  On that note, Mom is down nearly 60 lbs since October!! She seems to be melting away with each week that goes by.  Dad and I do our best to support her and are there to rub her back on the days when her tiny tummy protests.  While I have to do at least 6 months of prepartory doctor/nutritionist/weightloss attempts and various other things, I know it won't be long before I too am eating an ounce here and an ounce there and melting away along side of her. 

   The Spring semester begins on Monday.  I finished the Fall with a 3.27 GPA, not my best and certainly not what I wanted but I am not going to complain.  I came down with the Swine flu in Sept/Oct and missed more than too much class and my Math suffered greatly.  I eeked out a C as a final grade and I don't have to take it again.  Still, I have done well enough over the previous 2 semesters that I was a bit disappointed with myself. I have set a goal for this semester to get A's in all four classes.  I'll be taking another Geology, English, Math, and Anthropology class; all but the English with teachers I have had before. I feel pretty confident that I can achieve the A's if I don't let myself get too far behind in anything assigned.  That was part of the downfall in Math, following the Swine flu days, I couldn't catch up. Even though neither that class, the previous Math class nor the one I am taking this Spring can transfer with me, I hate feeling lost, especially when it comes to my most difficult subject.

  On a final note, I most excited about attending BYU because of the emphasis on Christ and Heavenly Father that is required for a degree.  I can't remember my seminary classes, apart from a few moments of inspiring testimonies and memorable faces of people who impressed me.  I can hardly wait to spend my educational time at the foot of the Master once again.  I have struggled over the last year to attend meetings on Sunday morning and because of poor self image have denied myself the opportunities to learn of Him and His Son.  I do have an inconquerable testimony of the Lord and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  My faith in His gospel will never waiver. Still, Satan sees a weakness and pounces on it and like in times before I have allowed him to influence how I feel about myself.  I know that my beauty and gifts go far beyond the physical, I forget this when I forget to see myself the way Heavenly Father sees me.  I choose from this day forward to strive always to see myself as He does and to appreciate my beauty the way that he would want me too.  Who knows what will come of this vow. I would venture a guess: more than I can imagine.